2010年 Sep 3日 Friday, 8:42

The first, and to date, last entry I wrote here was written at the height of winter, with snow all around me and piles of essays. The writing came easy, and was a welcoming break from coming up with sustainable polices for Angola. Its different this time, summer is drawing to a close and the bringing out of knitwear is a tell-tale sign. Not to mention the soft, almost secretive falling of leaves I keep noticing on my daily runs. and yes, just like a child, I gleefully step on a furled brown leaf hoping for that unmistakeable crunch. Alas, its not yet crunch-time. Well! it is in other aspects of my life. Apparently 'crunch' and stress go hand in hand. That does explain my penchant for bowls of crunchy nut cereal all through August. Oh but music is like the pebble I toss over and over in my palm when dealing with stress and like every summer tells a tale, this one was brimming with more music than I could imagine.

Firstly, the kominas, amazing musicians and great friends were touring the UK. They have a new album out with awesome tracks such as silver. I clearly remember the first time I heard this song and it was love at…. first verse? but then, I would say its kuj that makes it to the summer song list. (I have a list, don't snigger).

Secondly, my dissertation required , besides copious amounts of caffeine, a fair amount of time sitting at the computer. I should really have been typing impressive and intelligent words about permaculture and nature; but the odd distraction kicked in time to time. and like always, I reached for the classics. i shall be released, lola , got me wrong, lullaby…Its rather all over the place- much like the dissertation actually. It could be because the mood this summer has been one of tremendous ups and downs or the fact that me being slightly British, summer pretty much stretches from the minute the weather is in double digits till the last ray of sun bleakly shines trough the misty haze of gray and drab.

I quite like the gray and drab. Layering in clothes..having an excuse to be miserable. But the perfect winter day has to be freezing cold with the sun roaring defiantly. Surely I could have winter music too? It just doesn't have the same ring to it though does it? Perhaps that's because the airwaves (the radio and my personal one) get crowded with cheesy Christmas songs. Mostly the old ones. I am quite terrible venturing into new music. I just don't bother and recently I have begun to think "do I feel the same way because I keep listening to the same stuff or do I listen to the same stuff because I keep feeling the same way." I guess there is no real definition of feelings. When and where do these feelings begin and end; its more than just happy and sad. there is a lot of anger too, unfortunately.

But winter music, its got to be worked on..I suppose Jazz is quite wintery…but then its quite summery too, warm long summer nights, soft jazz. oh but wait, that crucial chill in the air is needed to make it 'work'…

.. My one and only winter song would be scarlet begonias ..but that has(sensibly) been stashed inside a box and pushed so far under my bed that its been three years since I last heard it.

So maybe this winter, eh?